This past month has been a tough one for our family. My sweet, funny, loveable dad suffered another stroke and quietly slipped away ten days later on September 19th. It was very difficult, but also very special to have that time with him. We were able to tell him everything we ever wanted to tell him, and though he was unable to speak, we had some of the most amazing conversations I’ve ever had. I will treasure those memories forever. What a blessing! And true to form, he kept his sense of humor and laughed right up until the end. We could not have been more proud of him. He lead a great life, traveled the world with the Air Force and Coast Guard Bands. He even played at several inaugarations and presidential funerals as a member of the USCG Band (sadly, he played both for JFK). But first and foremost, he was a husband, a dad and a grandfather. Writing his eulogy was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. There was no way I could read it, so John read it for me. It was such a comfort, standing together, but as John told everyone, we are partners and we do everything together! I don’t know what I would do without him. I wanted to share my dad’s eulogy with you, so you could get a small glimpse of what a special man he was.
My eulogy for my dad:
How do I find the words to express what an amazing man my father was? He was, quite simply, the best dad any girl could ask for. As little girls, we ran to him as he came through the door, and he would get down on the ground and roughhouse with us, or dance around the living room with us standing on his feet. He would reduce us to fits of laughter with his silly voices, or with the threat of being steamrolled. It was pretty clear, he loved being our dad, and we loved being his girls.
When I think of my dad the first thing I think of is his sense of humor. He loved to laugh, and he was always smiling. My dad was a master story teller, and there were lots of stories from his childhood, because his extended family was kind of crazy. My favorite story, though, is how he stole my mother from his former best friend! We never knew what he was going to say, which could be terrifying, especially when he used to lead the opening at church. He also loved jokes, the cornier the better.
When I was a teenager he would make it his mission to make me laugh by telling me one corny joke after another. Of course, I would only reward him with an eye roll, but he loved the challenge. And I will admit to all of you here and now, he was really funny.
My dad loved music. Our home was always filled with music and an appreciation of the arts. I used to love going to see my dad perform. He was such a talented musician, and I’m so glad that he lived long enough to see my son Alex start his trumpet lessons just two weeks ago. In fact, I brought a little video of Alex playing for his Nunu to the hospital, and it put a huge smile on his face.
My dad was always very supportive of us. He didn’t even blink an eye when I became a fine art major or later, an art history major. He just wanted me to follow my dreams. He was so happy and supportive of John and me when we started our photography business. My first exposure to photography was through my dad. He was a very talented photographer, having caught the photography bug as a kid when my grandparents gave him a Kodak Brownie camera. Later, when he was stationed with the Air Force in Germany he bought himself a 35mm camera which came home with him, and served him for many years. I love going through his albums and boxes of prints and slides. Not long ago when we were talking, he told me that he would have enjoyed being a photographer but it wasn’t an option when he was growing up. I’m so grateful that he passed his love of photography on to me and that I get to live that dream for both of us.
My dad loved my husband John, even though he was a Red Sox fan. Some of my best memories of my dad are from when we bought our fixer upper of a house. I never had to ask him to help. He was always there in his trusty overalls, doing whatever needed to be done. And then at the end of the day he would get down on the ground and play with my son Max. Those are memories I will always cherish.
He loved my two boys, Max and Alex, and they adored their nunu. He never missed a school event or concert, and for those of you who have ever sat through an elementary school first year strings concert, you know how tough that must have been for a musician like him. But he was happy to be there.
My dad was a fighter. After his stroke eleven years ago, he didn’t give up. With the help of my mom, who deserves a million speeches, he was able to take art lessons, go bowling, go kayaking and attend meetings with his stroke survivor support group. And there were lots of lunches out. Did I mention that my dad loved to eat? But the thing he still loved the most was playing his trumpet. In fact, he played in a two hour US Coast Guard Band Alumni concert shortly before he died. When I asked him how it was, he said “I did it!” I am so proud that he never gave up.
Lastly, he loved the Lord. When he knew he was dying, I asked him if he was afraid. He said “no.” He knew where he was going and he was ready to go home.
He was an amazing man and I’m so blessed to have been his daughter.
One of the things we did for my dad’s memorial service was gather photos for a slideshow. I can’t tell you how comforting it was to go through all of those old photos. Please, please, please, print your pictures! Even if they just end up on a box or drawer, they will be a treasure trove for your kids or grandkids someday! Here are a few of my favorites of my handsome dad.
As a young man in the Air Force.
He and my mom on their wedding day.
My dad and his trumpet. He played up until the end.
My dad was an amazing man and we miss him very much. I can’t express how thankful I am for all of the love, support and prayers from our friends and family, and the emails, facebook comments and cards we’ve received from our Brides & Grooms. Thank you all so much.